Tuesday, 17 June 2014

Our First Chat


Stepping into my party shoes, grabbing my bag, car keys in hand, I am a woman on a mission.  I open my eyes and my dream ends.

I clear the dishes from the table, make the beds and put the washing on.  I have plans for the day but nothing amazing will happen. I will be happy if I don't burn my toasted cheese sandwich.  I look at Merv and smile, just a little smile.  I wonder how many women look at their men after a long marriage and wonder who is this person they see? It is for me.  Thirty eight years ago (is it really that long!) Merv was tall, lean, good looking and had hair. Today he is almost as tall, well rounded and bald.  I daren't look in the mirror, my reflection is anything but pretty, my hair is shorter and a different colour, we won't discuss the sagging skin and wrinkles!

'Life is what you make it,' is a common saying but sometimes life itself just hands you a wildcard.  Merv's father was diagnosed with Huntington's Disease in 1994.  Merv was tested shortly afterwards as we have two children, both of them were teenagers at the time. Merv tested HD positive. In 2010 Merv's health declined and continues to do so.  Just because I can't remember saying, "for better or for worse, in sickness and in health," during our marriage vows I am under the impression I did. There were witnesses! During the rocky times in our marriage and there were many, we both knew this time would happen.  Like death you are never prepared, you take it one day at a time. The good with the bad. Always looking for something to smile about. Merv didn't ask for Huntington's Disease. Would he do the same for me? I am sure he would.

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