Poison or Amputate?

A question not to be taken lightly.  Should I use a bottle of poison or should I use my quick acting power saw for a messy amputation? It wasn't something I spent time thinking about, the answer was clear from the start.
Poison.
My memory clouded with images of me digging, sawing, prizing and eventually that damn tree stump lost its battle!  It was just a few weeks ago and those images pop up mercilessly.  It took over four hours over two days to finally wrench it from its hold.  I power sawed the endless roots which jutted from its colossal stump (well not really so big).  There is always one hidden anchor root.  I twisted the stump, I turned it, I swore at it and finally I put it in a headlock and severed it lose.
Triumph at last.
Then I remembered its opposing cousin hiding in my vegetable garden.  The sawn stump remains hidden under the compost and soil but on further evaluation it's sprouting new growth.  I began the haphazard task of digging around the stump only to give in and swear to a humane poisoning!  So it will be.  Another trip to the hardware stop for Blackberry poison.
It's been a busy month in the back garden.  Firstly digging up all the grass and reticulation followed by my friendly landscaper completing his work at hand.   From six quotes I felt he was the only one who understood my plan for a walk path for Merv to use in his wheelchair.
Merv loves his new place to spend time either enjoying afternoon tea or having a stroll along his own 'catwalk.'
Dustin and Grace visited last weekend digging and planting the array of native and flowering shrubs and plants I had chosen from a local nursery.  I hummed and ha-ha-ed where they should go and the final colour combinations.  Yes I read about that in a well intended garden book.  I had nightmares for a week.
Yesterday I bought a 30m retractable hose to water the garden in case the reticulation proved difficult and I need to put it off for a year or two.  Now I need someone to mount the hose reel to the wall.  The list is endless.
My garden plan is like a jig saw slowly coming together.  Next week we will have a Ocean Blue Shade Sail floating above our outdoor dining area and hopefully we can acquire an outdoor dining setting as well!  My much 'loved' pink and purple pergola will be repainted Classic Cream
Then there is the mulch, the stepping stones (many of which are needed) and God knows what else.  A garden is never completed, it is just a work in progress.
I like the idea of it never being completed, just a labour of love.  I can run with that.  While some gardens maybe a masterpiece mine might just be a 'paint by numbers' version but I will love it just the same because its mine.

Sleepless Nights

After digging in the garden most of the today I decided we would watch a 'nice movie' on Netflix.  Merv delights in his action packed movies but they're not for me.
"Oh, this looks good."  I remarked as I clicked on, 'Our Souls at Night'.  Starring the fabulous Jane Fonda who looks good at any age and Robert Redford who continues to have the cute boy look even his rather weathered features!
I was taken aback when Addie (Jane) knocks on Louis' (Robert) door and makes him an unusual  proposal.  She merely says she is lonely and presumes he is also.  Both their partners have died.  She proposes they sleep together for company not sex.  She says it is difficult to sleep by herself.
The story progresses with them giving it a try and continues with a healthy relationship growing between them.
I suddenly remembered a good friend of mine stating many times she is often awake most of the night.  She lives alone.  My thoughts then centred on the times I am alone in my own house.  I have security and my phone lies next to my bed but I find it difficult to sleep in an empty house.  Logic doesn't come into it.  If an intruder entered our house at night what could Merv do to protect himself or me?  Absolutely nothing.  What would Mel do? Maybe send me a text message?  She often texts me in the morning to see if I'm awake.  I sleep alone in my room I just know the presence of my loved ones in the same settles me into sleep.
So if my housemates are no good with a baseball bat, why does their presence give me a sense of security?  I gave this much thought.  Is it the presence of trusted loved ones?  Is it a spiritual sense?  I don't know.
Then a rather weird thought.  Maybe all the sleepless singles could pair up and have sleep overs ensuring a good night's sleep?  It's worth a thought!

Yo - Yo Weight

The news, current affairs programs, reality TV shows and those most annoying marketing shows continuously have stories on weight loss.  It's an epidemic of overload do's and don'ts.
It's got to a point you might as well just ignore whatever they say because tomorrow there will be another supposed easy solution for weight loss.
In 2012 it took me over 12 months to lose 18 kilos.  I was ecstatic when I finally found my hip bones!   I soon put back on 5 kilos but I was comfortable with my weight.  Since selling the house in January and moving I've put on an extra 5 kilos which is no friend of mine, it has to go!  With the arrival of Spring it is easier to eat salads and less filling foods, I feel I'm finally making headways but I know it won't be an easy journey. I travelled that road before...
Mel has been on her Weight Watchers journey since May and her journey is that of any inspiring yo-yoer.  "I have lost weight,"  she cries,  I remind her she is losing only what she put on last week.
Yesterday I decided I better check her food diary only to find her pro-points aren't matching the foods she is listing.  She ate a whole pack of Allens Party Lollies and a chocolate caramello bear.  She had recorded the points for the lollies as 3 points which is one serve but there are nine serves in the pack.  I searched the Allen's website for the information.  Ooops from 3 points to 27 points. I'm hoping that's a wake up call for her.  I have vowed to go through each day with her and we will  add the points together.  Her daily limit is 35 points, yesterday she ate over 89 points and wondered why her weight increased.
Eating out is difficult when watching the calories.  You either decide to say, "what the hell," and eat whatever you want or calculate the calories, fat and sugar contents.  I despair at the so called healthy cafes which list the calories (kilojoules) of their menu items.  They sound like scrumptious meals but most of them have 500-700 calories for a lunch dish.  Mel and I often chose to share a meal, thus halving the calories.  Last week we had calamari and salad, it was a big serve and filled us both.
We've begun measuring her again, every couple of weeks and it's now beginning to show a difference.  Mel is smiling once again,

Sharing 2 huge meals, we should have just bought one!

A Different Group of Friends

Mel spends hours texting her friends in Midland.  They send back messages.  She wants to know what they are doing.  I'm sure she feels she is missed.  In Midland she would walk through the shopping centre and greet not just one or two people she knew but a crowd of people!  I'm sure she misses that.
It's been six months this Sunday since we left the suburbs and moved south.  I have no regrets.
Mel has left a community group she joined here a few months ago.  They didn't connect together as she had hoped.  I believe in the saying, 'When one door closes another opens.'  We put our heads together and worked out a list of places and things she could do instead.  She now joins an art group every second week and the the alternative week joins a lunch group.  This has opened up a greater group  for her to meet and build relationships.  These groups have created a contact for her to join a Saturday morning group and another lunch group on the alternative Wednesday.  I must say I'm pleased.
My sister recently arranged to meet people she hadn't seen for awhile.  She said it was good to spend time with a different group of people.  We so often socialise within our own family and close friends boundaries and don't take that extra step.  It can make us feel so vulnerable.  What if they don't like me?  What if they find me boring?  Can they understand my reasoning or humour? What if I find them boring?  The list goes on,
Since we moved I also text my friends from before but not so often.  I have put myself  'in the firing line' by attending the community dinners, lunches with a group at local restaurants, even the 'busy bee' group raking leaves and other mundane chores at the resort.  The resort is open to all homeowners in our small housing estate.  It is community.  I'm glad to be part of it.

My New Mac

'You have to learn a whole new system,' said the woman sitting next to me at the Carer's Lunch.  She is right, of course.   It's almost like learning a new language,  Mac Chat, Mac talk, whatever it is.  The woman in the Apple Store encouraged me to think of group learning at her store,  My head did the figures,  45 minute drive to the store, then the lesson and 45 minutes back.  Brain punched out the figures and said it did not compute.  Hmmmm I responded, only one solution - use You Tube to learn the bits and pieces and the fine tuning,  Without leaving my seat I have already learnt how to remove the black dot below the task bar icons, how to do all sorts of things in Documents, including transferring my documents from my old Microsoft files,  Yes I have installed Microsoft Office for Mac.  I look upon it as a learning curve.  It took only a couple days before I connected by blogs in my new Mac Pro.
I wish I had all day to do all things Mac but I have so many more things to do.  Why do I do so much in just one week while Merv is in respite?  I suppose it is the freedom to do things I wouldn't normally do with Merv due to limited wheelchair access in many areas.
Yesterday Mel and I walked through the swampy areas near the bird park and today we took a road journey to Waroona, a small country town. I  photographed Mel next to the town icon, a life size cow dressed in a nightgown and night cap.  Just to amuse both locals and visitors,
We bought things from the second hand shop and the information shop, nothing from the bakery  before enjoying a healthy lunch at the old hotel, I was saddened to see so many empty and dilapidated shops along the main street.  After talking with shop owners there still  is a sense of pride and community among the residents,
Best of all was the colour of wildflowers, especially the vibrant yellow of the wattles littering the road verges.

Mousing Around

Tom and Jerry would be one of my favourite cartoons.  Cat chasing mouse and mouse winning.  Always a laugh!  How cute is it when Jerry speeds away from Tom and we all laugh!  I tell you I wasn't laughing when his cousin took up residence in Mel's room and decided to tip toe down the hallway!
I pushed back my chair in an instant causing Jerry's cousin to flee in full flight but I couldn't see his exiting direction.  I chose to sleep in the lounge that night instead of my room.
Early the next morning I was seen hooting down the road in a hail storm towards the hardware store.  I drove back with numerous mouse traps, electronic gadgets and a jar of peanut butter.  No cheese for this mouse, only the stuff to entice him!
Next stop a call to the Pest Control man who came out the next day armed with mouse baits for the ceiling. I called, 'War' and I had every intention of winning!
We searched and cleaned Mel's room but no nose twitching mouse did we find.  That night I set four traps in her room each with a generous smear of the dreaded peanut butter.
The next morning Mel called out the mouse had taken the bait and lay lifeless in the trap.  Was I sad? Shucks not a bit; relieved?  Yes.
I reminded Mel it was her room about fifteen years ago a mouse had snuck in.  I had picked up our overfed cat named Roxy and placed her warmly in Mel's room.  Thirty minutes later I checked to see if she had located the mouse but found her fast asleep on Mel's bed! Yes Roxy was well fed and had no interest in a playmate!
Since the (Tom and) Jerry affair I looked Mel in the eye and threatened her with eviction.  Mel hoards food in her room, whether it's chocolate, lollies or a half eaten McDonalds.  It had to stop and stop right now. 
Mel now has her own 'goodie' box complete with tight fitting lid in the kitchen pantry.  Woe to her and goodbye if I find any food in her room!

Celebrating Another Birthday

Not just another birthday but the big six zero, yes 60 years and still going strong.  I had spent over 4 months renovating and decorating our house. I figured I could have worked forever and the house would never be perfect so I just had to stop and let it be.
The birthday invitations had been sent and most of the guests had replied mainly in the affirmative. The only other birthday party I can remember is a party when I was just thirteen.  It was 1970 and I wore my hippy pants with huge white flowers on an indigo background.  We played all the rock and roll greats and had fun.  It lasted me forty seven years. This year with the big number looming I had no where to hide!  Ten years ago when I turned fifty the family went on a cruise from Sydney to the South Pacific.  On my fortieth birthday Merv and I went to Geraldton and there was little memory of my thirtieth.  Turning eighteen was no milestone in 1975 and my diary entry said I went to visit my best friend.  No mention of a cake.  When I turned twenty one it was a Tuesday.  Dustin was only 14 months old.  Merv had asked his Great Aunt (who made our wedding cake) to decorate a cake for me.  A few family members called in to have a drink and slice of cake and that was it.
I was way overdue for a birthday party.  No hippy pants and long hair for this one!

Merv had been in respite the week before and Mel attended a camp a few days beforehand.I even stayed with a friend who lives an hour south of me for a fun filled weekend.  We went to Laughter Yoga together, visited her communal veggie garden plot and worked at her son's farm before dining out in the evening. It was fabulous to have a break from showering and caring for Merv.
My birthday was the Tuesday before my celebration the following Saturday. It was a warm, sunny crisp day.  We went out for lunch with Maureen and had a great day.
My birthday celebration arrived and the sky was grey turning black. The wind howled and the rain poured and spluttered.  It was no spring shower!
I had expected a whole list of text messages from my dear friends saying the weather was atrocious and they would have to cancel.  I looked at my phone - nothing.  I looked later and there was nothing.
They all took the freeway with non stop rain lashing and black evil skies and arrived happy and smiling at the local restaurant I had chosen.
I gulped; it was difficult enough to get Merv from our house to the restaurant in the rain.  With the help of family it was easily achieved.
I felt very special.  Blessed that so many would brave the elements to celebrate with me and doubly blessed that they chose to do so.  How special is that!
It was such an amazing celebration.  My family and friends were all delighted in the restaurant and the excellent service and food provided. I was so impressed how organised and helpful they were ensuring everything ran smoothly. They had arranged the cake, poured the champers.  It was just perfect.
Afterwards my city friends visited our new house (all that hard work renovating paid off!) before they once again battled the weather to return on their long journey home.
A very special day.