Enjoying the Day

There are days which just merge into the next.  It happens to most of us at one time or another whether it's home life or the monotony of a job.  If you work for money it comes with the promise of holidays, a change of pace. If you work at home you hope and wait for a break.
I know couples who have never been apart.  They live together, holiday together always ensuring they are never apart not even for a day or night.  It's sweet but it's not me!
Recently I had the opportunity to have every Wednesday to myself.  A support worker visits Merv between 10:30am - 2pm to feed him his lunch and provide one to one support.  It's a done deal.  A whole day every week where I can choose what I'd like to do.  Yes, I know it's sounds rather selfish, but it's my day.
My very first Wednesday I caught the train to Perth with Melanie.  We shopped, we checked out new shops in the city.  We bought lunch and ate it enjoying the view from a picnic bench at tourist spot Elizabeth Quay.  We had a great day.  Every Wednesday is a different story and that's just the way I like it.  Wednesday is my day.

Christmas Tree in the city

Elizabeth Quay in the city

Home for Christmas

I smile as I watch the Woolworths commercial. A family travel by car, motor bike, plane towards a family member's house to celebrate Christmas.  It's a vibrant commercial with family members rushing to meet up for celebration lunch while the host and hostess are basting the turkey and getting the vegetables ready.
Any other year it would just make me smile; it's a great commercial of people getting together.
That's where the curve ball comes in.  Merv won't be coming home for Christmas.  For the first time in forty-two years Merv and I will wake up in different residences and experience a Christmas unlike any other.  There will be no celebrations at home, I'm not able to transfer Merv alone.  Dustin and Grace aren't arriving until 3pm on the day due to Grace's working hours.  It is what it is.
Merv continues to have anxiety related movement and mostly refuses to leave his room.  I have ideas that he will be happy to be hoisted into his wheelchair and have lunch with Mel and I in the dining room.  I later picture him sharing afternoon tea with Dustin and Grace on Christmas Day when they visit at 3pm in the cafe area.  It is my dream, my expectation, my hope.
Then I decide to clean down the fold up picnic table and throw it in the boot on the day. I cringe at the thought of lunch and afternoon tea huddled in Merv's small room.
Christmas isn't always what it's cracked up to be, but we have so much more than many others have.  We will enjoy it as it is, Merv is still here to enjoy the day just the way he is comfortable with.

Woolworths family Christmas get together 

Home for Christmas is the Woolworths message

Flying High

A month after the wedding in Port Douglas and off I go again.  This time it's much more local returning to the Swan Valley for a few days away.  Mel was off to Busselton for a ladies getaway with friends, so I took a break from my caring role.
I miss my handful of friends in Beechboro even though many of them have already taken the opportunity to visit me in my new home.  I spent a couple of nights in a farm stay B & B.  It came with a most delicious breakfast and acreage of cows, sheep, chooks and amazing pigs!  Then there are the stories...Marija said her husband found some eggs and brought them home placing them under the brooding hens and out popped two beautiful peacocks!
While at the B & B I visited friends morning, noon and night.  I spent a relaxing hour picking two bowls of plump purple mulberries from low hanging trees for Marija to make her famous mulberry jam.  I was introduced to chooks and pigs and the family dogs.  The younger dog we were warned enjoyed munching on visitor's shoes.  I kept mine safely on the inside!
It was a fabulous getaway followed a few days later with a family engagement party, finishing only a few days later with Mel's 39th birthday.  Mel was born on Melbourne Cup Day all those years ago.  Melbourne has a  public holiday to celebrate their world famous horse race.  It just so happens this year Mel celebrated her birthday on Cup Day.  Her friends celebrated with her, it was a fabulous day.
The getaways and celebrations have finally finished it's time to get back to everyday living.

Chooks, Chooks and more Chooks at the B & B

One of many many pigs

Merv and his girls, a happy man

Mel blowing out candles on her cake

Should I Go or Should I Stay?

There are times when a decision is needed.  A decision which turns around in your head, a cranial torture chamber.  You think and think some more.  You ponder, you weigh up the odds before laying your cards on the table and betting for a good outcome on the decision finally made.
It really shouldn't be a difficult choice
Mel is going on a three day/night getaway with a group of girls in the south-west.  A perfect opportunity for me to sneak away and enjoy a bit of peace and quiet.  I hummed and hawed, I found a B & B and pressed the button.  I'm booked.
I know if I stayed I'll pull up the weeds in the back garden.  I can't believe how much energy my weeds spend on growing bigger and more prolific than my plants.  There are armies of them in my garden.  I slaughter them and they come back for full revenge!  Enough about weeds and my dirty windows.  It's time to pack a small bag and drive to my refuge.
The community service staff are geared up to spend more time with Merv while I'm away.  I am forever grateful for NDIS who provide Merv with fifteen hours social support per week.  He is so isolated choosing to stay in his room all day.  I am happier knowing I can enjoy the rest of my day while they keep him occupied with singing and playing games.
There will be little opportunity to sneak away after this opportunity.  This time of the year we all seem to be busier and choices are not always available.
Yes I'm going and I'm going to have a great time!

A Beautiful Wedding

Over six months ago Mel and I booked our accommodation and flights to Port Douglas.  We didn't know what might lie ahead but we gambled Merv would be well enough for us to escape for five days.
The bride and groom announced their engagement over two years ago and the wheels were set in motion for the 'big day.'  They chose the amazing back drop of the beach at Port Douglas Queensland for their celebration day.
Like many of the guests we made our trip a mini holiday.  Mel and I booked an amazing tour after the wedding to the Daintree rainforest and Mossman Gorge. It was a fabulous experience.
We bought gorgeous dresses for the wedding.  Oh and then there were shoes and bags and makeup, the list goes on and on!  It kept us busy and we soon forgot about going to the gym or why we even signed up!
We flew on a country jet to Alice Springs, smack in the middle of Australia and then directly on to Cairns airport.
Port Douglas is an hour north by car.  The weather was a warm inviting thirty degrees celsius.  So much warmer than Perth at the time!
A day later the bride walked with her father among the wedding guests to meet her groom waiting expectandly for her.  She was a vision in white.  It was a truly wonderful wedding.  The reception was relaxed and fun.  The wine flowed and finger food was delicious.  Everyone enjoyed a most wonderful wedding.
The bride's mother fell and broke her arm the day before the wedding.  It wasn't planned, it just happened. It didn't take away from the two years of careful planning.  The bride had her most wonderful day and her Mum and Dad were there to share it with her.

Pamela & Mel dressed for the wedding, beautiful scenery behind 

Unexpectedly Lavender

On Saturday Mel and I went out for a healthy lunch followed by a trip to Pinjarra for some shopping.  I was looking for a variety of things including a birthday present for my neighbour.  She's turning seventy soon.  We checked the Edenvale craft shop and the quilting shop but nothing inspired me.  Edenvale display crafts from local artists.  There is an ever changing display of goods.  I have bought all sorts of things there but not this time.
We checked the local shops for bathers.  I should have tried on a bigger (or much bigger) size, nothing fit!  We did the grocery shopping and headed for home.
I wanted to stop at the local nursery on the way.  It's a sprawling rather unkempt eclectic display of plants, ornaments and landscape supplies.  I've bought an assortment of plants here before.  I spied an indoor plant for $12 but couldn't find anything else of interest.  I wondered, I prodded and wondered a bit more.  I had seen the plants out the back, at the front, under the shade cloth but not the vegetable seedlings.
As I walked aimlessly past the tomatoes, cabbages and beans there in front of me were true French Lavender plants in small pots.  I stopped, I stared, I smiled, I beamed.  Oh yes!  In my previous house I had fourteen lavender plants which made a hedge in my front garden.  When in flower the display and scent was amazing.  When I planted my garden in my new house last year I could not find true French lavender.  I checked everywhere.  There are lavender bushes at Merv's care facility and one of the residents suggested I propagate.  Did I want to wait that long?
I scooped up the four small pots at the nursery and added them with my indoor plant.  I beamed.  The woman said she had only had them in for a week.  'Finders, keepers,' I thought to myself.
Digging holes, getting dirty, making plans of how the garden should look.  My lavender might just have to stay in their pots for a few days while I get myself psyched up but it won't be too long!

Travel Plans

I was watching Anh does Italy on catch up TV.  How I loved Italy when Merv and I went in 2008.  My head swims with the most amazing memories.  I could just sit all day and recapture a different one every minute!
As I watched  the program I thought back to why I wanted so much to travel there.  I wondered what made me want to go to China the following year or New Zealand in 2011.  The answer is perfectly simple. I wanted to go because other people shared their lives, their memories, their joy in either living there or holidaying there.

S

T

I used to work as a carer for a 101 year old Italian Nonna.  Her family cared for her and they agreed to have a carer in after she turned 100!  Nonna had dementia and didn't speak a word of English.  Her family shared her story, their story and their heritage.  Nonna died at 102 and I had lost touch with her family before I touched foot in Italy.  I will always treasure their memories of their beloved homeland.
China in 2009 was a different story.  I worked with a friend whose son went to Beijing to teach English at a school.  My friend visited him during school break and she shared her stories with me.  Yes, I wanted to go to China.  Merv and I took the opportunity to take a five day cruise to the southern islands of Japan before beginning our China tour.  Afterwards we visited Hong Kong for three nights.  So many memories which we made our own.
New Zealand was something I had promised myself to share with Merv.  Though Merv became symptomatic in 2010 he was able to walk, talk, eat and drink with little concern in 2011.  We booked a disability cabin and cruised around New Zealand.  His parents had travelled to New Zealand in the seventies, not longer after we were married.  It took us over thirty years to do the same.
Now I travel alone or with Mel.  I miss the times Merv and I travelled together but we always knew our travels were to be treasured.

Celebration of Life

A few years back I went to a man's funeral.  He had HD but died from a stroke.  His wife was dressed beautifully in a flowery summer dress.  The invitation I received did not mention the word 'funeral,' but a celebration of the man's life.  It was held in a function centre overlooking the Swan River.
The room was filled with his family, friends and those who knew him.
It was a celebration.  It was a delightfully happy celebration.  His wife and his brother spoke of his life.  There were photos of him and memorabilia of his life plus his pursuits adorned the walls.  He was a lover of traditional morning tea and everyone delighted in indulging in the foods he had loved.
I spoke with Merv recently about what he would like; a traditional funeral or a celebration of his life. Merv loves a party - a celebration it will be he replied!
It certainly creates more work and commonsense suggests I have photos and memorabilia ready long in advance.
Merv is what you might call the average Aussie bloke.  He worked thirty years at the bakery,  loved his kids and spent time with them, enjoyed family life and much more.
Just the other night I decided to explore the depth of his life.  I shouldn't have been surprised when I listed two pages of achievements and interests.  So often we forget to look back at the whole picture.
Yes, I can put together a Celebration of Merv's life, it's going to take awhile but it will be project of love.

Doing the Dance

The last month of winter is upon us and soon we'll be seeing vibrant colours in the garden, enjoying warmer days and wearing less clothes.
Time for a bit more shaping up.  Mel and I have joined the community gym.  We have tried all types of gym classes;  Zumba (which Mel enjoys but not me), ABT (abs, butt & thighs) which I can just about master.  I have done a few classes in Tai Chi which I enjoyed.  My sister and I have done a few Pound classes (complete with plastic drumsticks) and a couple of Step classes.
There is a problem.  We all have a genetic flaw when it comes to balance and for me my brain and my legs work quite well together but my brain and my arms have absolutely idea how it should work with the footwork!  Therefore I work on the old saying, 'Fake it until you make it,' which in theory  is great but it doesn't look so good on the gym mat.  Oh well.
Our weight loss adventure began months ago with early, very early 5:30am walks which came to a halt with the change of weather and winter keeping us inside and me still in bed.  After that it was the excitement of the 'Little Book of Big Weight Loss,'  which had us inspired and helped with a few bad habits.
I asked Mel a month ago if she wanted to join the gym.  She had lost her inspiration with weight loss and from her previous experience she enjoys the routine of the gym and the easier classes.  Mel even booked a personal trainer for mid August.  Good for her.
Last night I'm flipping through my latest edition of Better Home & Garden magazine.  There is an article about yet another diet plan.  I roll my eyes but I'm already sucked in and I read the blurb.  I tilt my head as I'm thinking.  Yep, it's just another version of the Atkin's Diet.  Memories past return and  I remember I had renamed it the Constipation Nightmare.  I shudder and snap close the magazine.
Enough diet fads, I have the info, I know what works, I know what I need to do.  Do it I will.

Shoes, Shoes, Shoes

I spent my very first pay pack on a new pair of shoes.  Back in the day when your pay came in a little brown envelope.  It was stashed with cash!  If you wanted money in your bank (book) you took some of your cash and handed it to the cashier and they wrote in your book and added it to your previous total.  Oh how times have changed!

I've bought a whole heaps of shoes in my life.  I'm not a shoe-aholic, but I've had shoes for every occasion; the high heels, the fashion boots, sandals, wedges, flats and even garden boots.  They all have a use whether fashion or usable.

Recently Mel and I went to the ballet, treating ourselves to dinner beforehand.  I pulled out my high heels.  They have lived in my wardrobe without use of sometime.  My social life being literally non existent, there has been no need for flamboyant dressing.

I slipped into my strappy black heels and did a bit of a practise run.  All seemed good on my level floor.  

Our ballet seats were upstairs and the chunky wooden steps were a challenge in my gorgeous heels.

The ballet was amazing.  At interval the lights came on and people began to move out of their seats to  go downstairs.  My bladder said, "Here we go, let's go to the toilet."

I replied, "No, not in these heels, just chill and we'll go later!"  I won, my bladder waited! 

Recently I began doing the big clean out of my room.  I stood over my heels.  I picked them up handling them affectionately before throwing them in my car.  The following day I gave them to the Salvos.

I'm over sixty and at risk of 'old people falls risk.' I know a heap of people in their sixties who have had bad falls.  I don't wish to be one of them.

Recycle A T-Shirt

Everyday we hear another story of rubbish, especially plastics polluting our oceans and waterways.  It is disturbing.  I make sure my rubbish goes into my bin at home of a sturdy bin when I'm out and about.  I wince when I see rubbish along the road, in the park or on the beach.
When I think about my large green bin for general rubbish and my yellow recyclable bin at my house it dumbfounds me I have so much rubbish to fill them.  There is only Mel and me at home.  Yes I put garden rubbish, cuttings and grass clipping into the green bin but there is so much more.  Where does all my rubbish come from?
Western Australia is only a week away from banning the use of single use plastic bags.  Most of us have cupboards full of these dreary coloured grey coloured shopping bags.
Everywhere I look there is discussion on recycling.  Yesterday I made a shopping bag out of an old T shirt of Merv's.  The T shirt is old with a saggy neck. I followed the online pattern.  It's one of those trendy no sew, just cut and tie patterns. By the time I had used it twice today including dropping a 2 litre bottle of milk in it,  the ties at the bottom were beginning to unravel.  Maybe my knots will never qualify me as a sailor!  A quick seam with my new (Aldi) sewing machine could fix that problem.

The Recycle Bag is brilliant:

• it cost nothing therefore no need to buy other bags for groceries
• the T shirt would otherwise end up in the bin or the charity store 
• it's fun to make and jazz up if you want

I have plans to make a range of T shirt bags.  Big, medium and smaller.  I can make them for family and friends.  If they don't want to use them for shopping they can use it to wash their car or dress a garden scarecrow!

Bag It

Was I bored when I signed up for the local council business course?  I filled in the online application and hit 'send.'  It was done.  I received a call telling me I had been accepted.  I was ecstatic! Finally I was doing something worthwhile.
I had a moment of inspiration.  Our supermarkets/food stores are banned from providing single use plastic bags from next month.  Why don't I supply reusable eco bags.  The market is there. '
Cheap bags for many,  expensive bags for others and even a gift bag range.  The ideas were running in my head like a raging torrent!
Part of my business inspiration comes from my previous business in 200.  I had my own small shopping service where I shopped and delivered for individuals and businesses.  It was long before Facebook, Instagram and paid Google.  I had my shopping service listed on the search engines completely FREE!
Advance to 2018 and I'm ready for this.
Week one in a new course is always getting to know each other and the structure of the course.
Yes that was fine.  Week two was ok, I even did a little homework and came to the realisation I wouldn't need a business card.  Social media has taken over.  Other class members handed out their carefully constructed business cards, a shame not to take one or two, ok maybe everyone who handed them out.
Week three was a bit of a turning point.  Our homework consisted of getting our message out on social media.  I can do that I thought and put together a business Facebook Page named, 'Bag It'. So easy.  I jotted down a spiel and took a couple of photos of shopping in single use plastic bags and then in reusable bags.  I had thought putting the Facebook page up would be tedious and time consuming.  Then I found out the catch - they asked me to pay for it!
Brilliant, that is if you're actually going to sell something.
With a business coach it helps to 'gel' with them.  I was (and I believe others are also) having issues with her teaching strategies and the lack of viable material. I don't usually  give up on something I begin without good reason.
Today I'm not looking for a good reason to throw in the towel.  I just know my time is needed elsewhere.  Yes, part of me is disappointed, that is the choice I make.
With Merv's Huntington's issues I decided to ditch the business idea and spend the time with him.  No one knows how much time he has left.  I don't want to spend years in the future regretting this  time lost.

The Misery Club

It was a fine autumn afternoon and I was sporting the beginnings of a head cold.  How many of us waltz into a care facility covering up our health issues and hoping (and praying) not to pass it on to anyone there?
I wanted to be part of the action in the care home's carer support group.  Last month there was a fantastic turn out but today there were just me, the facilitator  and later a rather spindly old bloke with a walking stick.  Yes - this was us.  No offers of a cup of tea or tiny cakes.
The bloke with the stick turned out to be angel.  He professed his love for his wife in care.  She has Alzheimer's disease and each day he visits her even though she no longer knows who he is.  My heart bled.
He went on to say he lives in a retirement village.  Each month the residents get together for their own carer's group.  Their loved ones residing at a range of different care facilities in the area.  He smiled and said they call it the, 'Misery Group,'  as each of them has a gripe or two to share!
I smiled back.   People being people will always find fault, it's our nature.
He smiled again and said though we always gripe about something, it's not life threatening for their loved ones.  I smiled back.  Yes I may not always be happy with Merv's care in his care facility but I know they are doing their best and he's not in danger.
Thank you God for sending an angel.

The Book

Life is full of ups and downs.  Yes, when I stood precariously upon my scales UP is what they told me!  My weight loss of almost 20kgs six years ago was no longer anything to brag about.  I thought about the last year.  Selling my house, moving house, Merv's  continuing health decline.  Hmm wine, cheese (oh how I love soft blue cheese and rounds of camembert with crackers olives and more wine!) Oh and chocolate; chocolate with soft centres as well as creamy chocolate with nuts or fruit, better still both.  All of this food really loved me also because it had no intention of leaving my waistline!
I had walked to the beach and back, about 30 minutes return.  I had walked along the estuary and even been to the gym a few times but the extra kilos weren't budging.
In 2012 I spent a year drinking health shakes, trying the protein diet and doing weight watcher points.  It was difficult.  I hated the shakes and settled for the bars at lunch time.  Merv and I had returned from our around New Zealand cruise in January that year.  Cruises are full of picture postcard moments and a great deal more food than anyone ever needs.  Cocktails every night, three course, or was that four course dinners?  I remember being offered double desserts. Instead of saying, "No thank you I'm already full."  It was more like, "Bring it on, it is so wonderful..."
Needless to say I was in need of help not more food.
Six years later I'm revisiting all of this (minus the cruise).  I've lost a few kilos, I've added a few more since Christmas.  Time for radical stuff.
The thought of those insidious shakes or a return to the protein diet was enough to look elsewhere.  I had visited Merv before his Foxtel connection and began listening to some woman carrying on about her weight loss.  Oh God not another diet story!  I was interrupted by my phone ringing but wrote down the title of the book this woman carried on about.  That evening with nothing much planned I googled the title of the book and read the reviews.  It intrigued me with its simplicity and reviews.
What is this book?  The Little Book of Big Weight Loss by Bernadette Fisers.  I downloaded it on iBooks.  I figured it's better to lose $8 rather than $20 if I buy the printed copy.  Who knew whether I would actually attempt it just by hearing about it on a TV gossip show?  Anyway my sister, my daughter and I are on day 2 and heading for day 3.  It's a simple and achievable plan but like all things you have to put the work in.  Giving up processed foods and sugar, it doesn't sound easy but it appears it's not so hard.  Tomorrow we're having an ANZAC home baked cookie, it has sugar in it but it's a day of remembrance for Australians and New Zealanders.  Bernadette suggests dark chocolate and fruit each day.  All sounds good to me.  Hopefully I'll have better news to report later!

Making Noise, Being Heard

I bought Merv tickets for the matinee session of the Jersey Boys at our local Performing Arts Centre. I had bought them months ago to ensure we had the best seats.  Wheelchair access that is!  I logged into my brain and repeated the date, I clipped the envelope containing the treasured tickets to my dressing table mirror.  I dare not forget and I didn't.
With Merv in permanent care I arrived on the day to find him in his pyjama top!  I laughed with the day staff (muttering under my breath they couldn't tell he was wearing his pyjama top) while I redressed him in an appropriate dark green polo shirt.  So much better.
We headed for the cafe on the foreshore and ordered a big bowl of hot chips for him.  Mel and I shared a basket of pulled pork sliders.  Oh so yummy!  As I paid the bill in cash I noted I received $10 less than what I should.  The staff member printed out the receipt (muttering under her breath I was taking up her time).  She pointed to the total which was $10 more than I ordered than she looked at the items listed, snatched the $10 out of my hand and replaced it with a $20 note.  No explanation provided.  I know that's happened before.  The error being my order was added to the previous order. Thankfully I was checking my change and not paying by card.
We enjoyed our lunch on the boardwalk enjoying the slight cool breeze and watching the pelicans drift past.
Mel went home and I pushed Merv in his chair to the Performing Arts Centre.  It was packed mostly with grey haired seniors.  There were lots of wheelchairs and as the line to enter the auditorium grew we were asked to stand aside.  I understood they needed to get people in chairs first.  The cordial usher looked at my tickets and said they would find me a seat elsewhere.  No time to mutter, I pointed to the seat numbers and said, "These are our tickets and we expect to sit here, my husband cannot sit unattended!"
The usher disappeared, maybe I then began muttering.  The bell was sounding for all to enter and we were still waiting.  The usher's superior noted the urgency (the bell was still sounding) and had all the other wheelchair repositioned to allow Merv's chair to be next to my permanent seat.  I know that put a few people out but surely they knew they might be higgety piggety all over the place with their loved one placed elsewhere.  The man sitting next to be spent most of his time leaning over me to check his Mum on the end of the line of wheelchairs.
Merv thoroughly enjoyed the group.  He sang along to their well known songs; Oh What a Night, Bye Bye Baby, Sherry, Big Girls Don't Cry and Walk Like a Man.
A good time was had by all.

Friend or Foe

Routine, routine, routine.  I'm trying hard to make changes to my day.  When Merv went into permanent care my routine changed overnight.  No longer did I wake and toilet him, shower myself and then embark on the daily breakfast and personal care routine.  Now the mornings belong to me and me alone.
Mel and I have to be motivated to step out for a brisk walk.  Sleeping in seems to be its rival.  I thought a little stretching and yoga would be a satisfactory substitute.   Well last week we stretched and this morning we yoga-ed.  At least we attempted to.  Bum in the air, hands struggling to keep balance on the mat and trying to eye the You Tube video all at the same instant.  I like to think it was ten minutes but possibly less than four before we tumbled on the mat and turned off the TV to have breakfast.  At least we had emptied our lungs and refilled them a couple of times. Yep, stretching only tomorrow.
Last week we enjoyed the ballet, something we couldn't have done with Merv at home.  This week we were off to Bunnings for some serious DIY gardening.  I had booked by phone and arrived early with Mel in tow.  We sat on the nice white garden chairs and soon the tiny area filled with expectant fellow DIY ers.  We had a fabulous time potting tiny herbs in fabulous self draining free pots.  Our supervisor watched over us with an eagle eye.  Off came our free garden gloves and with a squirt of sanitiser we were filling our paper plates with hot cross buns, tiny chocolate eggs, dips and Tim Tam biscuits.  No small morning tea here, more of a serious party.  Coffee was served and raffle tickets distributed.  Everyone received a prize with first and second prizes worth $100.  Mel and I won the secateurs, a good sensible prize.  Bonus it was free.  Oh and then there was a gift bag filled with samples, seeds and other goodies.
I sat next to a woman who lives in the next suburb.  She began to chat to the supervisor and I found we have a bit in common.  We had both lived in Beechboro, worked in Bayswater and we both own our own homes and cars.  Nothing unusual there, lots of people do.  I thought this woman and I could possibly be friends.
Then the waves parted when she said she was fussy about her friends.  She said she loses friends because she says what she believes and people don't always agree with her. I thought most of my friends are pretty much the same way inclined.  I enjoy their friendship, we're all opiniated in some way or other.  I know I do the same.  My friends put up with me and I with them.  It what friends do.
The woman hadn't quite finished and said she was so over friends who didn't own their own house but were renting.  How was that relevant to anything?   Were they asking to stay with her or in need of money or food or both?
I can't wait for the next Bunnings garden DIY project,  I'll be there keeping a safe distance away from this not so friendly woman!

Does it Work?

I was a bit cross, truthfully I was more than a bit cross.  Mel has a support worker; a paid worker who spends three hours per week with her.  Young and fit, independent and lazy.  How do I know this?
Ok, maybe not lazy but just like all her friends - addicted to texting and avoiding work as work is at every turn.
The young lady arrives late, returns Mel early and spends copious time texting.  Today she took Mel in her car and left her there while she jumped out and paid her rent.  I wondered if she writes down the mileage and whether she will claim for the journey to pay her rent!  I was peeved when I heard Mel recounting today's time with her.
It made me think about the many times Merv's support workers have waited for me to leave before ringing their friends or family and having very long chats.  I've walked in on numerous such incidents.  The worst scenarios are where the support worker sits at the dining table doing her homework or other activity while Merv sits in another room watching inappropriate TV programs.
We all know it's not just support workers who are eager to keep their phones close at hand, talking, texting and checking whatever app is the favourite of the week.
A recent study went as far to say full time workers are often doing two hours work and wasting the other six hours.  I think back to my employment days.
There are coffee machines, chats of variable length while pushing buttons and steaming milk, toilet breaks, friendly chats to other members of staff.  Nothing to do with the job, social chit chat.
We talk at length to clients to whom we provide a service or product.  We end the conversation with  chatter of our footy teams, the weather, oh please not politics!
We bond, we take sides, we question and make judgement while our workload increases and forgotten.
Our schools have sorted themselves out.  They collect the student's mobile phones before school  returning them after the last bell.  They are children and we treat them as such, as we should.
Adults?  What is a solution or compromise here?  No-one knows.

                                               

Australia Day Celebration

The garden is finished, the house is just fine and Australia Day was just perfect.  The sun was warm but not too hot, the sky blue and the locals and holiday makers were out enjoying the weather and themselves.
We live in a holiday city and the locals will tell you to stay away from the tourist hot spots during the public holidays.  I keep this in mind when we plan our morning.  Firstly the outing, secondly the Australian Open.  Merv is a tennis fanatic!
Just down the road is a fabulous lake just metres from the estuary,  The lake is full of ducks, swamp hens, coots and as many sea gulls.  There are park benches and cute wooden bridges with a winding concrete path, ideal for wheelchairs.  It's already after ten and the car park is full so we wind around the streets until we find suitable parking.  The wildlife are living it up and the locals are in the estuary crabbing.  The rellies are keeping us supplied with crabs.  In the shallow water are family groups with mum and bub sitting on the steps hoping for a feed of crab for lunch.  We walk for awhile until we find a shady picnic table.  It's on the grass area and it takes all my strength to push the chair on the wild green grass.  We sit and eat our morning tea and enjoy watching others in the water and those flying by on their cycles with lycra and helmets flashing.  They later past us on the path as we stroll along and over the bridge.  It will soon be midday, time to return for a lazy lunch and tennis not so long afterwards.
As I prepare lunch my mind wanders.  I remember the many Australia Day celebrations of the past.  The numerous outings to Perth whether on the foreshore or at Kings Park to view the spectacular fireworks displays.  Memories of countless barbecues and get togethers with friends or family.  Then the year we had friends over for lunch and I created a huge jelly map of Australia!  Yes, Aussie flags, balloons and paraphernalia.  There is none of that today just the outing and a toast of water glasses over a healthy lunch!

Aqua Buddies

It's holiday time, many of the locals are on holidays and those already retired are free of appointments.  Give them a few more weeks and they'll be off to the dentist, doctor, physio and the podiatrist.  Another week and card in hand they will be lining up at the specialist rooms awaiting their turn, frustrated they have already waited two hours for an appointment they know will be over and done within ten minutes.  Still they wait to have their numerous ailments discussed and mulled over!
We are in the resort indoor pool at 10am and a great herd of locals have turned up for the water aerobics.  The regulars know each other well and catch up with family and local news.
I've only been a few times in our almost ten months of living here.  Most of the faces are unfamiliar.  The lady one door up I recognise and I ask about the health of our mutual neighbour.  It appears his health scare has resulted in a second operation but he is going to be just fine.  I am relieved to hear this.
Thelma calls us to attention.  I don't know how long she has been running this class three times a week but she knows every move by heart.  Her voice is soft and I strain to hear her instruction.  We warm up with those crucial arm stretches above our heads but after that I'm stuck and I copy the person in front circling my right foot under the water and changing over on Thelma's  command.  There is no loud bopping music, there is no music at all.  Just Thelma's instructions and a few wayward people both male and female chatting away and not really being attentive.  I watch as Alan and Bob make up their own moves until the foam noodles are handed out from the stash on the side of the pool.  Then the pool is filled with grey haired ladies and gents with a noodle between their legs (yes it's the Rocking Horse) striding up and down the pool.  We must look a sight!
I check out the time on the clock on the far wall.  Twenty minutes down and and forty more to go.
The next time I check the time there is only five minutes to go.  I have been miraculously following the moves (and making a few of my own up) while merrily chatting away.
I see it how it is and not how I would like it to be.  It's an exercise class and a reunion of local residents.  Everyone is comfortable and looking forward to their next class.  Why change it?

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